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Addiction Hurts…

“I am the wife of an addict & this is part of my TRUE story…”

this is a true story of my life…names have been omitted (except my own which shows in the author section) 

Yes, World! I was brave enough to get on the internet and say that I am the wife of an addict. An Opiate addict…

Opiates, yes, but not heroin, “Pain Pills!!!!” Yep, that’s right, a drug that you don’t have to chase down; one you wouldn’t sometimes have to venture into neighborhoods that are so scary the people who live there dare not go outside after dark; yet they hear the addicts feigning outside their homes in the danger for their next fix. No my husband became addicted to pain pills; a drug most doctors can (not saying they do but “can”) prescribe: ironically the person that can heal the sick and make lives better can also give people access to something that can ruin lives, even the lives of people not taking the medicine

The sad thing is, it hasn’t always been this way but I guess it never starts like this…I know I’ve held on longer than most would; thinking the man I exchanged marriage vows with, would return one day instead of the “stranger” inhibiting him that I wake up beside. But when do I realize he’s NOT coming back & let go? Or will I? It’s hard to walk away from someone you truly love knowing you might be their only chance; but then again I know from experience that you can’t help someone if they don’t want help…

Now you might  be wondering where things went wrong and why a “drug” could make a man turn his back on his wife, his best friend for crying out loud!, and his kids…This is the million dollar question I too am awaiting answers for & probably the main reason I am still holding on… Or maybe why he had them to begin with or who he got them from…which is the big shocker

***Stayed tuned for more of “Addiction Hurts”***

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Family blueprint?

I am the only girl for my parents, 2 brothers for me. One is 5 years older than me & the other 5 years younger so 10 years between the two of them. My older brother is also my 1/2 brother but my dad is the only one he’s ever wanted to know which in my eyes sometimes makes it easier on kids, especially if the external parent (mom or dad) can’t or don’t care to do their part. I don’t know all of my parents decisions on this matter but I do know my older brother was already 4 or 5 when they married (my mom is several years older than my dad) and my dad never adopted him so my older brother always had a different last name…kinda weird as a kid for everyone not to share the same last name so I remember asking why once & my parents told me they waited till my brother could choose if he wanted to change his last name which would involve my dad adopting him and my brother told them “No” but only because he was used to that last name, as was his friends and school.
Now that I have kids of my own it’s a similar situation…I have two boys that I had 8 years apart who are also 1/2 brothers and my oldest doesn’t know his real dad; however my husband adopted my oldest son when he was 3 before he knew “his other last name”. I don’t plan on telling my son that his real father literally overnighted the termination of parental rights form, which was required for the adoption, back to our attorney. Nor that he and his brother only really share 1 parent in common. (Unless there were some life threatening situation to arise and telling him could save his life.)
But the weird twist to the story is: my older brother married a woman older than him, who like my mom, already had a son. (His wife and my mom even share the same birthday.) My brother, like my dad, let my nephew decide on the name changing ordeal; my nephew also declined. My older brother & his wife also have two other kids & all 3 kids are 5 years apart each…
So my mind wonders: is their some kind of predestined path for us and our choice of family life and offspring? Is it in our genetics? Is it a blueprint unknowingly burnt into our brains because of the way we were raised? Will my nephews, niece, & my own 2 kids live these oddly similar repetitions when they marry & have kids of their own? Is my family the only one with these odd patterns & does the rest of my family notice these similarities?
Maybe my questions will be answered and maybe not, maybe research has already been completed and I just didn’t get the memo!
As for my little brother will he only have 2 kids like my dad? Only time will tell with him though…he only recently left home but still returns to mama & daddy’s on every Friday night and stays until late Sunday evening EVERY weekend; I feel sorry for the woman he does marry, LOL

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